Slap Me Silly

"A girl is like an Iphone, you have to touch the whole thing for it to work. A guy is like a blackberry. You roll one ball and the whole thing moves."

zustin:

when ur fav fucks up and u can’t defend them

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(via australiansanta)

penis-hilton:

you should want a bad bitch like this

penis-hilton:

you should want a bad bitch like this

(via australiansanta)

suarezalex:

okay seriously if you’re in a relationship or even a friendship and you find yourself spending more time crying out of sadness or arguing with them, leave them. i don’t care if they’re a modern day aphrodite/adonis or a gift bestowed upon you by the gods. toxic people are dangerous and i highly advise cutting them out of your life and finding someone who makes you laugh until you snort your drink out your nose instead.

(via discomforted)

fairytrainer:

fairytrainer:

btw in case yous have slept on this - there is an amazing tv show that exists on this earth called I Wanna Marry Harry where they’ve tricked a group of american girls into thinking they’re on a dating show competing for the heart of Prince Harry and it’s fucking phenomenal 

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(via australiansanta)

illkim:

When that song comes on in public only you know

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(via ant0rm)

itunestore:

itunestore:

Hw isn’t getting done


she still loves sleeping up here. 

itunestore:

itunestore:

Hw isn’t getting done

she still loves sleeping up here. 

(via ant0rm)

arrowdactyl:

when you say a great comeback without stuttering

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(via death-by-lulz)

cumsock:

she dead

cumsock:

she dead

(via wild-rara)

gaydirectioner:

Freshman year:

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Senior Year:

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(via guy)

Can everyone just take a moment to think about the fact that they are married in real life

(via doonarose)

real-scars-fake-smiles:

Married life with Ellen and Portia.

IDC HOW MANY TIMES IVE REBLOGGED THIS IT IS LITERALLY MY FAVOURITE FUCKING THING

(via m-u-l-b-e-r-r-y-y)

hbunot:

I would punch you but that would be animal cruelty.

(via collapsed)

sandvviches:

my dad just got a goat

sandvviches:

my dad just got a goat

(via awkwardlyobnoxious)